The World's Tiniest Tree
I've seen tinier.
That's right, you'll be the envy of pilots, telescope enthusiasts and other people with heightened vision everywhere with your tiny, tiny new tree! The Flowering Tiny Tree may not be visible from space or even more than 12 feet away, but what it loses in stature it makes up for in adorable.
The World's Fanciest Crate
not pictured, a lack of fancy
Ok, I know what you're saying, "Matt, is this crate really fancy enough to hold my collection of diamond encrusted opera glasses, wearable crystal chandeliers, and baroque churches?" The answer is yes. If you ever see a fancier crate, check again. Someone may have just put a monocle and top hat on a common crate and filled it with DECEIT! We've all been lied to about crates in the past, so let me set your mind at ease: this is 100% genuine, guaranteed Fancy Crate right here.
The World's Snackiest Snack Machine
it's like a fridge that costs money to open!
Tired of your friends scamming all your snacks when they come over? The Cafe Snack Machine has you covered. Freeloaders take note, the only thing you can't buy here is friendship. (it's rental only)
The World's Spooooookiest Table
clawed hand chairs sold separately
Strike fear into the hearts of small dogs and the knees of your dinner guests with the Gothy Kitchen Table! It may look like a statue, but that's real gargoyle! If you like to flavor your dinner parties with the chance of your furniture coming to life and cutting a bloody swath through your guests on its way back to whatever unholy corner of this universe would spawn such a horror, this is the table for you!
The World's Uhhh... Umm... Sharpest? Guillotine
nothing rhymes with terror! Lame pun machine you have failed me again
Last seen in a thinly veiled threat to my own person, "let them eat cake" with your own Reign of Interior Decorating Terror playset! (seriously, google it, no rhymes!) No matter your budget, the Guillotine makes decapitating all that pesky nobility and overthrowing tired, ossified regimes not only efficient, but also fun!
If only such items were available in purchasable form.
Well now, they are! Remember, you can find these new goods at any of the VIKEA merchants (just hit 'buy new stuff' in your Home decorating menu) in the Commercial District or Downtown New Valencia! Happy decorating!
